SELF HELP
The healing of brokenness is a journey and not a quick fix. It is a journey that one can only embark on if you have a strong desire and willingness to find the gold that will mend your brokenness. No one is going to force you on this journey, you have to care enough for yourself, to put in a lot of work to reap the benefits along the way. I use the word “journey” as the gold is scattered in fine sandlike grains along your path and in some miraculous blend of willingness, faith and grace, it all
comes together and starts healing the broken parts one by one.
Silence practice
We have to silence the outside world to really connect with our inner self - our thoughts and feelings and eventually the wisdom that lies within us all. I joined a community that does silence practices and found it very helpful to be surrounded by other people that are looking for peace and fulfillment on the inside.
Courses
I attended too many courses to name them all here, but in all of them I found some gold. I kept on searching until I found the things that worked for me and I will mention a few that stands out.
Theophostic ministry:
An innerhealing ministry that deals with triggers, traces them back to the first time you ever have experienced the feeling, followed by a spiritual process of inner healing. This is a Christian course and also the place where a lot of my healing started. I did the course but only went for the counselling a while later, after my first son was born and I found it difficult to cope. After each session, it literally felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I experienced a lot of healing and started on my journey towards a more healthier place.
The Enneagram
I call it the journey into the mystery of our true identity.
It is the most effective guide to transformation, self-observation and self-inquiry that I have ever found! It guides us to discern our filters, personality patterns, interpersonal strengths and weaknesses - in other words, finding out what your “auto-pilot” is. It cultivates awareness in the present moment and leads to an enriching journey inward. I have been on this journey for a few years now and am finding deeper insights into my world and my “self” constantly. I strongly recommend attending this course or doing a few Enneagram Coaching sessions if you are at all interested in understanding yourself and what motivates your actions.
Women Within
I attended my Woman Within Weekend in Hermanus in 2017 and it still stands out as one of the biggest breakthoughs I have ever had on my healing journey. I delt with huge limiting beliefs that were holding me back. I have since made so many breakthroughs, being supported by a circle of women who supports me. This has been lacking for me, having lost my mother when I was 15 years old and my sister passed away before I was born. My circle is like a constant safety net for me, challenging me, supporting me and empowering me to be truly and fully me.
Please visit their website https://womanwithin.org/
Their description about Women Within:
“We’re women offering programs to help other women know, empower and embrace all parts of themselves. Some join us through a Woman Within Circle; others through a Woman Within Weekend®. Our global Woman Within International nonprofit communities encourage women to support each other in fully living the lives they want. Most importantly, we are a community of Women dedicated to learning how to be the best we can be.
The next upcoming weekends in South Africa will be on this link:
Workbooks
My favourite way by far to work through a workbook is in a group. If you are not already part of a group, get some like-minded people together that are all willing to work on themselves. Here are some workbooks you can consider working through:
1. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron
We did this 12-week course as a group of moms and I it truly helped me to reconnect with my dreams of singing again. I had been quiet for 18 years, working through my brokenness. I wrote a detailed description (as one of the brilliant exercises in the workbook) of a little show I wanted to do. I described what I was going to wear, the crowd and how in awe everyone would be while I was singing. When I wrote this, it felt very far-fetched but I wrote it anyway. A few years later, I put a little show together where I was brave enough to tell my story and sing 7 songs that I recorded as well. I was in awe of the power of writing down detailed goals. Please give this course a try! It is not just about being artistic, it is about living life!
2. Kinstugi
Finding Strength in Imperfections by Céline Santini
“Enriched by stories, advice, and practical exercises, this book will guide you through your own healing process using the different traditional stages of kintsugi, whether your wounds are physical or emotional” Céline Santini is a writer, blogger and personal-development coach.
3. The Resilience Workbook. Essential Skills to Recover from Stress, Trauma, and Adversity by Glenn R Schiraldi
“The Resilience Workbook offers essential strategies to help you bounce back from setbacks and cultivate the inner strength needed to rise above life’s challenges. You’ll learn to harness the power of your amazing, adaptable brain; manage strong or distressing emotions; and improve your mood and overall well-being. Most importantly, you’ll gain real skills to thrive, no matter what obstacles life throws your way”
Are you going through a tough time right now?
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Be kind to yourself and tune in to what you are feeling and what you need
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Focus daily on things you can be grateful for
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Ask for what you need
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Breathe deeply, 30 times. Fill your belly, ribs/lungs.
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Find support
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Pray
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Drink tea - alone or with people who are special to you
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Be in nature